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Sex and the new parent
Last updated: Thursday, March 05, 2015

If you've recently had a baby, it is highly unlikely that your interest in sex will be what it was before the new arrival. But don't be too hard on yourself. There are things you can do to renew your flagging interest.

Give yourself a break
Your life has just changed completely – don’t beat yourself up if sex is the last thing on your mind. New mothers may find that breast-feeding, getting used to a new routine and pressure from a partner to have sex inhibit their sex drive. Respect your feelings, take your time and do what feels best for you. The less you worry about sex, the more likely you are to want and enjoy it.

Plan for sex
With much of your day dictated by your baby’s needs, it’s important to plan time for sex. You may look back fondly on the days when you could drop everything and get nasty whenever the spirit moved you, but the reality is that these days you’ll probably have to plan ahead. The anticipation, however, can add a nice thrill to your upcoming encounter. If you’ve got babysitters, you may try scheduling a regular time during the week for sex. If you can’t find someone to baby-sit, plan around your baby’s schedule. If he or she takes a regular nap, use that time – just make sure you’re relaxed and rested too or sex may feel like a chore. If your baby’s schedule is unpredictable and you’re up for it, grab your partner the minute the baby falls asleep – you may discover some spontaneity after all.

Get help
Call on family, friends and neighbours to baby-sit so that you can spend some time with your lover. If your budget permits, consider ordering prepared meals, hiring a housekeeper or having the bank pay your bills directly. Every minute saved is one you could be spending with your partner.

Respect your health
Your sex drive will stay on permanent hiatu ... Read more


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